Staying in Motion When Unsureness Hits

I became inspired today when reading a recent post on White Hot Truth on the "I don't know conspiracy". I would be a complete fraud if I didn't admit I've been my own victim to this very downfall many times. When looking at my own life, and recent surge of happiness and empowerment, where previously I found little, this is one of the areas that's really made a difference for me.

So you come across a lousy situation or state of mind and you simply stand in "I don't know what to do"...now what?, Danielle's posting offers up a very good point. That mentality doesn't serve you. However, that mentality is the first to creep in during the tough points in life. This is the mentality that has people in a lot of unhappy situations.

Reading the post has made me conscious of times when i'm confused but yet empowered and instead say "I will figure it out" (even when I really don't know yet)! I'm then coming from a stance of preparedness and a motive of action. The inactivity of simply stating "I don't know" and then doing nothing from there is of no use if it isn't followed by resolution to find a new possibility.

Text Blogging Adventures to Come

Today I activated the blog via text feature...I plan to text over short (one-liners) of wisdom, gratitude, or things that just plain make me smile. I often think of things to share with the blogosphere; or merely just to remember, throughout the day. I figure this will lead to not only more regular updates, but more spontaneous bursts of goodness.

Share your uplifting one-liners with me!

Finding Happiness

With a title "Finding Happiness" looming above, you must think this entry must have some magnificent, yet simple, gems of human wisdom in it. I doubt that, but I will say that rehearsing happiness does have it's privileges. I haven't got an entry in this whole month...but many life-blog thoughts have been appearing in my daydreams and journaling, so it's time I shared.

When I think on rehearsing happiness it sounds like either one of two things: a)This girl is nuts to think she can just find happiness by rehearsing it; or b)This statement is so simple, it could easily be overlooked for foolishness. I think the reality is somewhere in between. Most definitely the average unhappy person sleep-walking around isn't paying attention to their own ability to have a happy life. Thus, argument b is in play. Yet the foremost conclusion, the one where I'm a delusional woman thinking she can simplify the difficulties of life into a glib little statement - is also true. Let me caveat that with, it's only true if you want it to be.

So, when I am sleep walking through the muck of life, I'm guilty of believing in that cynical conclusion. I will report that when I catch myself sitting around in my own muck (aka: pooping in your own fishtank, if I were a fish in this metaphor), I am shorter in my bounce-back to a happy reality than I previously was. I've never considered myself a happy person, until now. I'm starting to notice the force of optimism and the strong will for happiness I've actually had moving in me for quite some time. Whether I realized it or not, I was born with this ability. I also believe we all are born with this ability.

What does it take for one to tap into her or his own well-spring of happiness? Go on, try it. I dare you to catch yourself feeling hopelessly stuck in the muck, and then just try this on. Try on that if you start to just "be like you're happy", you will start "doing things that a happy person does" and 'lo and behold, before you can make sense of it or start to complain again, you'll have a happy self on your hands. This isn't instantaneous and of course life still has pain. It's the suffering that is optional. What do you have to lose?

Do you have particular methods for getting yourself out of the doldrums? I find reading other blogs such as the Happiness Project are a reliable source of inspiration when I need to refuel my own happy charge.

Concentration is hard, except once you're actually doing it

The topic of focus I'm closing out with this post is the yogic principle of concentration practice, or dharana. A good write up on dharana can be found here. When first evaluating this principle, I could readily find examples in my life where my concentration on yoga asana and breathing practice has been able to seep into my "living life" in a positive way. During yoga practice, the opportunity to practice concentration is ongoing. Concentration, which is quintessentially "being in the moment", is most evident during balancing poses or physically difficult poses where strength or flexibility are challenged.

I'm fortunate enough to say that living through these concentration challenges while in the safe confines of a yoga asana practice have allowed me to view myself and my capabilities in a much more positive light outside of the yoga practice. For starters, if you can practice focusing on breathing long enough to hold a pose you didn't think you could do, or balance on one leg for an extended period of time...just think of what miracles you can stretch yourself into while living life!

When completing tasks of everyday life over the last two and a half weeks, I often reminded myself to return to the state of dharana, or concentration. The fact I had to remind myself shows I have much more room to practice. This is a good thing, as I get to continue exploration of this principle. I love that the teachings of yoga allows you to respect where you are in the present, all while providing a positive context for growth inside of your already perfect self.

I find it most difficult to stay present and concentrated when I'm upset, anxious, or have any other type of negative emotion. If I'm in one of these states, it is helpful to if I can get to a state of peace by concentrating on the moment versus the upset. Afterall, all upsets in reality are just feelings about something that's already past. However, getting there, or trying to get there can be the tough part! Using the negative feeling as a reminder is one way to train oneself to get back to the present, to focus on the now.

Namaste

Thoughts on Maitri Experiences (and lack thereof)

Practicing loving kindness towards oneself is an easy practice to forget. The last two weeks I found myself often forgetting this concept entirely and inevitably delved into the self-inflicted pains of blame, self-doubt, and frustration. However, the times I did remember the practice were well worth noting, as evidence to keep this principle alive no matter what. Though many times in life we can find plenty of reasons to not love ourselves (that may look different for each of us, but we all experience it), it ultimately does us no good.

For me, investigating the "why" behind self blame/hatred is reason enough to drop it altogether. As with all non self-kindness activities, it's merely a way to avoid responsibility for whatever it is that is going on in our lives we're associating the contempt. Blame in general acts as a diversion from dealing with reality. Hatred (especially when directed at the self) is a way for one’s ego to avoid attention on the matter at hand and instead focus on the separateness identified with the object (in this context, oneself). So why not turn that around and merely fess up those unappreciated attributes to ourselves instead? Learning from real or imagined self-inflicted dislike is much less painful than reliving such matters. Logically this makes sense, but I’ve found it can also be hard to remember.

In light of the human tendency to conveniently forget what's best for ourselves, I will cut to the chase on the reasons (benefits) to remember to apply the principle of Maitri. When I was able to access self love and kindness in times of pain, what I found was a sense of recognition of choice. When I needed it most, coming back to it was like having the experience of suddenly remembering a wonderful thing that had simply skipped my mind. I remembered the choice that I always have right inside of me to have reality occur differently. In all my moments of recognition, my case against myself was obliterated by the compassion, love, and reason I provided inside of that wonderful memory. When being with loving kindness with myself, I no longer felt agitated, uneasy, or blameful of myself -- or others.

Perhaps flexing this particular memory will work like exercise, as in muscle memory. The more I use it the more I'll remember to use it going forward. What do you find challenging or rewarding about the practice of loving kindness? Please share your thoughts in the Comments.